About Me - Kori
Who Am I?
I am a mother of two KAD boys adopted from Holt Korea, currently
aged 12 ½ and 15. I am a retired police officer, who does volunteer
work and I am just finishing my Masters of Business Administration
Degree from the MidAmerica Nazarene University in Kansas. I plan to
put my devotion into this project even after I obtain my MBA.
My Adoption Story
I was adopted just before turning three years old by my parents, who
live in Kansas. I had only been in the care of the adoption agency from
the age of 2 ½ yrs. I have three younger siblings, of which two are also
adopted. One was a domestic adoption and the other was a Korean adoption. I feel very blessed to be here today because of how my life could have turned out had I never been adopted out of Korea. As I look at the scar on my leg from my past life in Korea, I remember the nightmares I experienced for years and know I may never learn of who caused them, but still know they are a well buried piece from my past life.
My reason for adopting my two boys, whom are my only children by choice, are because of the connection I yearned for, along with the love and identity I wanted to be able to share with two other adoptive Korean children I was not able to have growing up. Please do not get me wrong, my parents gave my sisters and I lots of equal love, but I lacked the identity part, especially after becoming a young adult. I did not grow up with my youngest sister, the other Korean adoptee, who is ten years younger than myself. Additionally, she quickly bonded with my white adoptee sister as soon as she came into our house.
I lived in a smaller, predominantly white, suburban community. As I was growing up, I experienced lots of discrimination by kids I went to school with of various grades. I was constantly made fun of and treated differently. At that time in my life, I was quiet and shy. However, I always stood up for what was right when it came to other people. I once got punched in the stomach during recess by a boy for taking up for one of my younger sisters, who was actually the one who popped her mouth off first. I was not a tomboy at all, but it did not matter. I had empathy for others at a very young age because I knew what it was like to be treated poorly and looked down upon like you were worthless. I would sit with the “unwanted” girls at lunch whom no one else would sit with because I felt bad seeing them sit alone. I did have friends, but they were the boys who were my neighbors and classmates. It just felt lonely. When I went to Junior High and High School, some things changed and improved.
I am not going to keep boring you with the rest because I do not feel it is important. The reason I share that last bit is to simply let you know I do understand how it feels to be treated like a second-class citizen. I still experience it at times. I am not a “typical, everything was so great” KAD, but I have learned so much over the years and grown as a person into who I am now. I feel like I could do anything I want to do if I put my mind to it. Would I feel this way if everything had gone my way and been smooth sailing? I really do not think so. The harder you must work for things in life, the more perspective you gain, and the better of a person you become. I truly believe this and my road has never been an easy one, ever. I have not even dived into the family thing, which I will refrain from.
Why Am I Involved in This Project?
I feel very passionate about helping those who have not had a voice HAVE a voice, as they deserve. I was not surrounded by very many Asians growing up, nonetheless KADs, unless you want to count the Holt annual gatherings? Those were still regional, and I was not around enough KADs to know about any “issues” going on. I learned about the KAA page after returning from my second Korea trip just this February 2018. I could not believe I did not know, nor had never thought of checking for one prior to this. I let life get so busy I had not taken the time to even think about this part of me. I began to read posts about male KADs not having a voice and how bad things were for them growing up in ways different from female KADs. It was disheartening and was eye opening for me. I was seeing things with my own two KAD boys, but was not recognizing the magnitude of what was really going on, and neither were they. I felt like I needed to become a part of a solution, regardless of how small, or large. Change must start somewhere. The Adopted Asian Male needs his voice to be heard. Please listen and spread the word.
And, Derek is a crazy nut (actually, he's a slave driver! shhh! don't tell him I said that. LOL) to work with and I like to edit the crap out of his writings..... hahaha! Love Derek's writings!
What Exactly Do I Do?
I help mostly with things behind the scenes. I'm the editor of the posts, I help do some of the administration duties, business development, and help promote the site. Derek and I try to brainstorm and make decisions as a joint team on everything, since we're partners in this effort. By the way, I'm not quite as serious in person as I seem in this introduction. :)